A Girl’s Girl

Transgender is an umbrella term that unites all those whose gender identity does not match their gender assignment at birth. The term does not represent drag queens or transvestites. It refers to people trapped in the wrong body. Bhoomi is an example of the reality we need not hide from.

 A stunning 6 feet tall, with long luscious hair and a brilliant smile, Bhoomi bounds down the Equal Ground stairs and welcomes us with open arms. A giggling girl at heart yet born in a male body, she tells us about her struggle to fit into society and lead a normal life.
Bhoomi was an only child who went to D.S. Senanayake College (an all boys school). She tells us that since she was little she always knew she was different – her childhood dream to be like Madhuri Dixit, to dress like her, act like her, dance like her. Uncertain whether she was meant to play with boys or girls, she always felt more comfortable with the girls. She recalls having a nice childhood but when she reached Grade 5, she realised her classmates were eternally excluding her from games and groups for classwork. Bhoomi has always had a high-pitched voice as her voice never cracked. Since she quite clearly sounded different to the other boys in her class, during concerts she was never allowed to sing on stage, only backstage with the
teachers. She tells us how her teachers loved her but also tried to encourage her to act more boy-like to fit in. This was not something she could control.
In grade 11, her crush of 5 years made fun of her in front of her whole class, laughing at her saying she didn’t have female parts. Thankfully also around this time Bhoomi met her best friend Moksha. She finally had someone in her life to talk about her feelings and how she was different because she felt like a girl but had been born to a boys body. “It was nice to finally have a best friend, someone who cared about me and loved me for who I was,” Bhoomi exclaims.
Once Bhoomi had finished her ALs and left school, she tells us things started getting harder as she started to grow her hair and nails, and wear make up. Her mother gave her a hard time, telling her to live somewhere else, but Bhoomi couldn’t even understand it herself. She prayed to God for a miracle to make her a girl.

Moksha introduced her to Equal Ground where she went to a sensitizing workshop on gender, sexuality and gender based violence run by Charles Nigel De Silva. It inspired her and she gradually started learning more and more about herself. She was glad that she wasn’t the only one in this situation and she realised that her life was valuable.
Bhoomi did an interview for a show called Mogamodhi (Mask), talking about her situation and her feelings about it. By some chance the program did not cover her face as they were meant to and it was viewed by her mother, their community and even the people at the Kovil. People who could not relate to where she was coming from began to give her a hard time. It was at this time that her mother kicked her out of the house. Bhoomi went to stay with her boyfriend at the time as she had no where else to go. The problem with this situation was that her boyfriend had told his parents that he was in a relationship with Bhoomi’s ‘twin sister’ (Bhoomi does not have a sister), so after 4
months Bhoomi moved to her own place in Rajagiriya. She tells us how difficult it was for her to find a place to live because she sounded like a girl on the phone, but looks like a boy. When she tried to explain to them that she was a boy physically but was going to become a girl, people were uncomfortable because they did not understand her situation.
Bhoomi started working at Equal Ground in 2011 (around the same time as the Mogamodhi interview came out), she tells us that it was them who helped her find a place to stay, gave her a job and the support to be strong. At Equal Ground, Bhoomi works as a Field Officer, a Counsellor and a Youth and Transgender Networks Co-ordinator. She likes her job and likes that she is slowly, one person at a time, changing people’s attitudes toward Transgenders.
Bhoomi says she knows girls don’t have all the same opportunities as men in this country, but at least they can be girls. She is frustrated that she speaks up so much for women’s rights, when women themselves don’t understand her plight and deny her her rights. There are moments that Bhoomi feels lonely and harassed, as even the simple pleasures are complicated. She says: “I get a lot of attention from boys – but I think it’s just for sexual things, not love, and I’m not happy with that. Once when I was sick and went to the hospital the receptionist called upstairs and said come down and see ‘magic’. It’s embarrassing. I’d rather be sick than go there again and be upset.”
She tells us that her parents accept her slightly more now and that her father told her that he doesn’t mind if she’s a boy or a girl, as long as she doesn’t let society laugh at her. She considers herself a Transgender who wants to be a girl. She is currently receiving treatments and is hoping to increase her doses of female hormones soon. One day her dream is to have Sex Reassignment Surgery (SRS) but there is no rush. She’s been reading up on it and tells us there are new methods coming up all the time. What she really wants is to be able to have a baby. Even if not her own biologically, she is sure that one day she will be a mother. Her friends have advised her to stay a shemale in case any problems occur, but she explains that she has been living this ‘halfhalf’ life right now. She just wants to be fully female, not for her society’s sake, but for her own happiness. Bhoomi is hoping to change her name officially but will need her parents present for that, so that has been put on hold for the moment.

source: http://lt.lk/a-girls-girl/